What is Most Important to You about Sex?
Sex is a vital part in every romantic relationship between two people, but many times people take this act for granted. Many people believe that sex is for one person and not for the couple involved in the action; this, in my opinion, is severely wrong. Today, the act of sex has become immensely selfish; each person is in it for themselves and works to find their pleasure before the other can reach their climax. I find that the most important thing about sex for me is the idea of reciprocity and the relationship between giving and receiving pleasures. Without the partner in a sexual act, there would be no act in the first place; so why do so many people believe that it is right to take pleasure and not bestow pleasure? It all comes down to the idea of keeping oneself happy.
What I have learned from my sexual endeavors is that sex is a sacred thing; it is spiritual, physical, and completely beautiful.
Each time I have a sexual experience my focus is on making sure that the female I am with finds her pleasure, while I find mine as well. After I had my first sexual experience I never thought of this ideal, but as one grows they learn that it is important to be respectful in every way during sex. For example, from my experience men are many times frustrated with women for taking oral pleasure; and after, not giving the gift back. Given, it is always the female’s choice to choose the act’s she would like to perform; but, I believe there should be some kind of equal medium between sexes. On the other side of the spectrum, I have heard women complain about many of the male population not being very partial to conalingus; which I find sad as well. Even though the acts during sex almost define the joining of the counterparts, there is always the large problem with equal emotions during sex. I can honestly say that many times I have had the problem of unbalanced emotions between a girl that I have had sexual relations with (I’m not proud of it). Even though this has happened to so many of us, it is almost a certainty that it will occur with romantic emotions and sexual acts. The problem with this unequal balance of emotions is that you cannot force someone to genuinely like you, or force yourself to genuinely like someone else; so reciprocity many times with emotions is out of the question. Sex is so powerful that if it occurs it can sometimes instantly draw emotions from the depths within oneself; that is one draw backs of consistent. Along with the previous topics, I find that the other problem with reciprocity works into the idea of truthfulness. I, like most people, have lied to partners about many different things; this is a very large problem in reciprocity. Without trust, no reciprocity is possible between two people; unless inhibitions are thrown to the wind like somewhat of a “one night stand”. In the end, the fact is that reciprocity between two people is such a broad spectrum that there can and will be an array of different problems with the subject; the best thing is to try and see each person’s views and comprehend them. In conclusion, I believe that in a healthy sexual relationship both partners should have some sense of reciprocity. Without this sense of reciprocity one will find themselves locked in this state of pure inequality, which is a heart-wrenching situation one can be involved in. I find that for me, it is best to set ground rules to help build trust. When it comes down to it, reciprocity is more of a choice than anything; but I believe it is a choice everyone should choose to make.
Take That Home In a Green Doggie Bag